live somewhere cool like Belgium or something
1. Name: Emily
2. Age: 16
3. Location: Yorkshire
4. Marital Status: Single and "FUNDAMENTALLY UNLOVABLE!" according to the drunken version of myself.
Top Fives! 'This is where we ridicule you on your tastes so dont muck up and
reveal you love Avril Lavigne, OK?
1. Top five bands The Rolling Stones, Regina Spektor, Bob Dylan, Sam Cooke, Damien Rice
2. Top five films The Commitments, Fight Club, Some Like It Hot, The Last Waltz, Peeping Tom
3. Top five life moments I saw The Rolling Stones live in August and I was WITHIN SPITTING DISTANCE OF THEM. I met Richard Whiteley and got his autograph and he told me I reminded him of Tarzan. One day me and my best friend saw this man wearing a fake beard in town and we had nothing better to do so we tailed him and followed him into this cafe and he sat down at this table with a man dressed as an astronaut and a man dressed as a red indian. It turned out this christian camp were having a day out and the leader people were all in disguise and the kids had to find them. But we found them instead. The first time I got drunk was pretty amazing, not even because I was drunk but because it was a funny funny night. Going to a fancy dress party as Geri Halliwell, with the most badly made outfit you will ever have seen. It was a dress with union jack bedsheets pinned onto it. And I wore some black boots and was like "CAN YOU GUESS WHO I AM?" Nobody could, funnily enough.
4. Top five songs that make you want to dance like Christopher Walken in the
Weapon of Choice video. Loaded by Primal Scream, All That She Wants by Ace of Base, Oh What A Night by Amen Corner, Superfreak by Beatfreaks, 3 Is A Magic Number by De La Soul
5. Top five TV shows Mock The Week, The Mighty Boosh, Fawlty Towers, Cold Feet, Red Dwarf
6. Top five crushes Ewan Mcgregor, Noel Fielding, Kate Moss, Keith Richards, Dylan Moran
7. Top five comedies/comedians Ross Noble, Dylan Moran, Russell Howard, Bill Bailey, Jack Dee
8. Top five books Lady Oracle by Margaret Atwood, Wait Until Spring Bandini by John Fante, The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde, Fight Club by Chuck Palahniuk, The Pianist by Wladyslaw Spzilman
Random questions- Cause were nosey twats
1. What has been your most embarrassing moment and why? I headbutted my supply teacher in the arse by accident. Then bolted out of the lesson. He was not impressed.
2. What is your favourite thing to do on a Sunday afternoon? I finish work at about 3 oclock and then my friend comes round. Then we have a Sunday ritual which is eating chocolate fudge cake and listening to American Pie.
3. Who is your role model and why? I don't really have one.
4. Favourite Ice cream flavour? White magnums are heavenly. I lived off them for an entire summer. And as a result lost about a stone and a half, so I won't be trying that again.
5. Ever had a crush on a fictional character? I have wanted Vince Noir to be my boyfriend since the first time I watched the Boosh.
6. What song do you want playing at your funeral/wedding? Go To Sleep by DMX & Eminem.
7. What do you think of the mods? They seem very canny.
8. Opinions on drugs? I'm too lazy and too poor for my own drug habit. As for everybody else, they can do what they want.
Opinions- Cmon! Annoy some people with your ‘way out’ opinions
1. Abortion? I'm all for abortion.
2. Religion? I'm not religious at all. I don't mind religion. Whatever makes people happy. I just really really hate god botherers who go around handing out leaflets. I especially hate the ones who draw you in by giving you a leaflet with something about football on the front, but then you open it and it's all "If life was a game of football, God would be the referee!"
3. War? It's a bloody bad job.
4. Santa Claus? The idea of Santa creeps me out.
5. Homosexuality? There's nothing wrong with it. People who honestly think there is need to fucking grow up.
6. Isn't Final Fantasy X better than Final Fantasy 7? I've never played any kind of Final Fantasy. The only thing I've ever bothered to play on a playstation is Spyro.
7. McDonalds McDonalds, Kentucky Fried Chicken and a Pizza Hut..? My mother once threw a hissy fit in a KFC drive thru. It was class, I wish I'd recorded that. The woman taking her order was really pissing her off so she started screaming and shouting and swearing and eventually yelled "FUCK YOUR FUCKING CHICKEN AND FUCK YOU" and sped off. A+
Post an ORIGINAL work. This could be a song, poem, photograph, part of a report,
piece of prose, etc. Anything that you made; it could even be a journal entry
that you thought was really funny or creative
I got very very bored and tried to inspire myself to write something last week sometime. My english teacher keeps telling me I should try writing poetry. However, any poetry I write ends up being emotastic. So I figured that instead of fight the emo, I would embrace it, I would write the biggest pile of emo wank anybody had ever written. I'm not sure if I achieved it, but I amused myself at least.
A distorted lens is a cliche
I see the straight lines
I see what cannot blur
Rigid and constant
They watch, as we interwine
I am still-life
I am stillborn
Despondence and interference
Crackle in my ears
The horizon seems closer now
Fires blaze behind his eyes
Yet on the surface they are cold and
Glassy, like the milk bottles
Left out in the harsh grey morning
And a photo if you’ve got one! Not that were judging you on looks, we just like
I do usually smile in real life.